Fourteenth: Intimate Weddings in Covid Times
In the middle of March of 2020, I witnessed wedding dreams slip away with each passing day, week, and month. Most of my brides rescheduled their ceremonies and receptions. A few decided not to put their lives on hold and instead say, “I Do.” Their stories touched me in different ways and have even taught me a bit about love and life during the time of COVID.
Photo by More Cowbell Please
On June 19th, I celebrated my 38th wedding anniversary on Martha’s Vineyard. While my husband worked around the yard, I decided to check in on my brides. Many had emailed or texted their wedding date changes, but I wanted to listen to their stories and let them know I was there for them not only as their designer but as a friend. I began making calls at 10:30 in the morning and finished at 5:00 p.m. just in time to get ready for our anniversary dinner.
Alisandra & Wesley ~ JUly 7, 2020
Laurel Acres Park, Mount Laurel, NJ
Photography by Family and Friends
Alisandra was supposed to get married in Orlando, Florida on July 17th. One hundred forty guests planned to join them for their destination wedding. She arranged to have her bachelorette party in Disney two days before the wedding and end their wedding weekend with a Disney themed “Ever After” brunch. She and her fiancé decided to postpone their Orlando celebration until April 9th, 2021.
“I was sad at first and definitely felt a lot of pressure. My gut told me back in March that we should postpone. When May came, I knew it was crunch time to make a decision. We were both on the same page with our concerns for our older relatives and putting them at risk. It wasn’t worth it to us!”
With all of the stores closed due to COVID, Alisandra bought a dress on sale from Francesca’s Boutique online. She bought flowers from Whole Foods and wrapped them in ivory ribbon as her bouquet. The sandals she wore were supposed to be her comfort shoes to slip into while she danced at her reception.
“When I called Alisandra, she told me that she and Wesley decided to get married in the local park with only twelve family and friends (and their French bulldog named Rio) in attendance to witness their vows. I sensed that Alisandra was making the best of times that were out of her control. My heart ached, thinking of the drastic change to her wedding day dreams.”
I decided to make a small hair accessory for Alisandra with some of the crystals and gems we planned to use in her original headpiece for her Orlando wedding.
“I planned to wear a hair accessory that I bought for our engagement shoot. When Marie called me and offered to make a custom piece for my minimony, I thought it would be the perfect touch. Marie shipped it out, and it came to my doorstep one hour before I had to leave the house. I was so happy that it came just in time and even more excited that I could incorporate something blue on the day I got married.”
“I felt so happy! It was so simple, and all of our focus was on each other. I didn’t worry about my hair, my dress, or all of the details that come with a typical wedding day.”
Alisandra and Wesley celebrated back at home with five guests. They had food delivered and enjoyed cake and champagne.
“My dream wedding plans have changed, but I know one thing for sure. I want to smile and dance the entire day and night. I love LOVE and have always enjoyed going to other weddings. My dream is to embrace every moment on our special day!”
Alisandra’s advice for brides:
“My best advice is to go with your gut! That ‘gut feeling’ is usually a sign from the universe. It was such a weight lifted off my shoulders when we finally changed the date.”
Kyleigh and Matthew ~ July 10, 2020
The Forest Lodge, Warren, NJ
Photography by Anthony Ziccardi Studios
Kyleigh and Matthew decided to marry on their original wedding date. They had been engaged for two years and decided they didn’t want to wait any longer. They switched to an outdoor venue and drastically reduced their wedding guest list to abide by NJ state-mandated regulations. They coped with the stresses of wedding changes during COVID, but had to deal with an added surprise of marrying outdoors during Tropical Storm Fay!
When I spoke with Kyleigh in June, she told me that they were getting married outside at the Forest Lodge. She told me she bought a different gown for her small wedding and asked if I could have her hair accessories ready for July 10th.
“Our plans changed drastically. I was not able to have my bridal shower or bachelorette party. My maid of honor and bridesmaids threw me a mini bachelorette at my parent’s house two nights before the wedding. Our wedding changed from 200 plus people indoors at The Grove to forty people outside at the Forest Lodge during a tropical storm.”
Hair accessories by Headpiece.com
Gown by Martina Liana
“There were so many feelings when I realized I would have to change my wedding vision. I was sad and angry, but also jealous of all the people who were able to have their dream wedding. Then I would feel bad about feeling that way when there are way worse problems in the world right now. I quickly realized the most important thing was getting married to my best friend. Nothing could stop us!”
The wedding ceremony was supposed to take place on the grounds of the Forest Lodge and the reception under the Maple Grove Pavillion. Tropical Storm Fay forced the bride and groom to change their plans yet again.
I loved this photo of Kyleigh and her dad and asked her if she could tell me about the moment.
“My dad was telling me that he loved me and that he knows Matthew is going to take care of me. He said he is so happy and he doesn’t have to worry. There were so many emotions, especially because of all that happened to get us to that moment. There were mostly tears of happiness.”
Hair Accessories by Headpiece.com
“Surprisingly, I never felt sadness on my wedding day. Despite the storm and change of plans, I was marrying my best friend. The best part of our wedding was our wedding vows. We chose to write our own, and it was such an emotional time. The whole night was amazing, and I still can’t believe it even happened.”
Kyleigh’s advice for brides:
“My advice would be to GET MARRIED!!! Even if it’s not what you thought it would look like, there is nothing more important than marrying the love of your life. We truly have no idea when the world will be normal again- so don’t wait! It was nice to spend the night with my husband and our closest family. It gave everyone a reason to be happy!”
Devon and Robert ~ June 20,2020
Mount St. Mary Academy, Watchung, NJ / Ninety Acres, Peapack, NJ
Photography by Barbara Wentzel
Devon and Robert couldn’t imagine any other option other than their planned June 20th, 2020 wedding date. They decided to have a microwedding at St. Mary’s Academy where Devon attended high school. Twelve guests witnessed their vows.
“I was heartbroken. I think I cried at least once a day for about three weeks when I realized that things needed to change. Even when we did change plans, I felt slightly better, but I was so worried that the day wasn’t going to be as special or that it would detract from any other big ceremony down the line.”
“On the morning of my wedding, I felt a total sense of calm.”
“I wore a little white dress from Amsale. The only accessory I wore, other than my ‘something borrowed’ from my mom, was my headpiece! I wanted to keep the look very simple.”
After the ceremony, Devon and Robert had a wedding dinner at Ninety Acres. This venue was supposed to be the location for their rehearsal dinner. Tucked away, they had a perfect outdoor dining space to host their small group of guests.
Devon embraced color for her table decor and wanted her flowers to be HAPPY! Cassandra Sha delivered on her request and created a beautiful vibrant, setting where the bride and groom could focus on each other.
“I know now that I wouldn’t change a single thing about my wedding day. It’s hard even to pick a favorite moment, or memory, because it was all so memorable. It’s only this group of brides that get to say that they were not only able to celebrate their wedding in an intimate setting, but we also get the big party down the line!”
Devon’s advice for brides:
“There are no wrong choices and there are no longer rules! Everyone wants the best for you, and as long as you’re happy at the end of the day, that’s all that matters.”
Dina and Andy ~ August 20, 2020
Bear Brook Valley, Fredon, NJ
Photography by Yan Schwartzman
Dina and Andy planned to marry on March 28th at Bear Brook Valley and then renovate their kitchen in lieu of a honeymoon. Their nuptials were among the first to be canceled due to the virus’s spread. I checked in with Dina several times to see how she was doing. She kept positive and looked forward to their new wedding date of August 20th, 2020.
“At first, we were very upset to change our wedding date but realized that the health and wellness of our family and friends were far more important than one day to celebrate. On our original date, we cooked up some steaks, baked a cake, and had some drinks. It poured on March 28th, so we were thankful that we didn’t have to deal with the weather.”
Blusher veil by Headpiece.com
Gown by Maggie Sottero
Dina came to Headpiece.com for her hair accessories and one of our striking blusher veil designs.
“After speaking with Marie and telling her I wouldn’t be doing a first look with my fiancé, she suggested I do one with my dad. It was so special! I’m so happy we were able to have that memory together.”
By August 20th, restrictions were still in place for wedding venues. Dina and Andy decided to go ahead with a formal ceremony in front of 30 guests. After their vows, they took formal photos on the grounds of Bear Brook Valley.
Dina told me she couldn't wait to wear her wedding gown again. She even brought up the idea of changing her wedding style up for her vow renewal and reception that will take place in April of 2021. I would love to help her add an element of surprise for her 250 wedding guests.
After the wedding ceremony, Dina and Andy invited guests back to their home where they had a mobile brick oven pizza truck, cake, and drinks!
“The best part of the day was walking down the aisle to marry my best friend. I am so happy we get to start our married life together and look forward to a big celebration in 2021!”
Photos by Jenna Tulino
Dina’s advice for brides:
“Whatever your decision is, it’s the right one. There is no one size fits all mold for COVID couples. Just know if you can plan a wedding through a pandemic, you can get through anything!”
Deanna and Frank ~ July 25, 2020
Longwood Lake, Jefferson Township, NJ
Wedding Photography by More Cowbell Please
Deanna and Frank looked forward to their wedding at David’s Country Inn on July 25th, 2020. As the days counted down, they still found no answers from Governor Murphy if indoor weddings would be permitted.
“It was all extremely overwhelming. I felt so alone during the entire process. As a bride, you look forward to your dress fittings, your bridal shower, and bachelorette party. I was not able to have any of it.”
“I went Headpiece.com to pick up my headpiece for our small ceremony. We started talking about the change in plans and the significance of my engagement ring. I began to break down in tears. Marie was so heartwarming and kind. She just listened to me with no judgment or opinions, and it felt so comforting. Marie wanted to make me feel like a special bride and asked if she could gift me with a handmade veil for my intimate wedding.”
My heart broke for Deanna. I pictured the day my daughter, Brielle, got married, and I thought of all of the time and planning we put into that magnificent day. For some reason, Deanna’s story hit me hard. I wished I could hug her and tell her this wedding nightmare would go away, but I couldn’t. I offered to make her a veil suitable for her dockside wedding vows.
July 13th accessory pick up at Headpiece.com
Photo by Headpiece.com
July 24th veil pick up at Headpiece.com
Photo by Headpiece.com
Deanna and Frank decided to get married on their original date. She wore the dress she bought for her bridal shower.
Deanna and I texted each other until late into the night on her wedding eve. I was so excited for her and wished I could have brought a lawn chair to the lake to witness her marriage. I ended our chat with “Happy Wedding Eve to my HPC daughter, <3.” She replied, “Sweet dreams <3.”
“My husband and I went on the rowboat after our I Dos. We had beer cans hanging from the boat. My dad gave us a bottle of champagne and told us we couldn’t come back until we finished the bottle. We took the rowboat out and made our rounds to all the guests from across the lake to thank them for watching our ceremony.”
The newlyweds look forward to their vow renewal and reception on February 27th, 2021.
Their wedding celebration ended with a family pontoon boat ride around the lake. S’mores and fireworks were the icing on the cake!
Deanna’s advice for brides:
“If you have the opportunity to have an intimate wedding, I highly encourage it. Don’t let others’ opinions get in the way of your ultimate decision. Listen to your heart. Having an intimate wedding is more relaxing, less stressful, and allows you to control your day. It will forever be a lasting memory!”
My Reflection
Photography by Antonietta Henry
During this time of so much disappointment, I see so much positive. Brides have freed themselves from the pressures of wedding perfection. Quite often through the years, I have seen my brides place so much emphasis on the tangible details. Wedding vows are intangible, and something lived. I love the stories of Alisandra, Kyleigh, Devon, Dina, and Deanna. They let go of perfection and allowed love to be the center of times they couldn’t control. Simplicity, individualism, and the bare essentials make for some incredible love stories.
I look forward to following these brides again in 2021. I hope you will all join me in that blog. Stay well, and live to love! <3 —Marie
See you next month on the Fourteenth